Everything I Know About Happiness I Learned from a Child

A refresher course in joy
I'll be stressed out — about a missed UPS delivery, her sleeping schedule, vacation plans — and I'll realize that Sigrid's been grinning at a pillow for 15 minutes. The vaguely Japanese print on the fabric seems to make her totally blissful. Perhaps she has a future in textile design — or maybe an infant's happiness equation is simple arithmetic (nap + milk + something to gaze at = bliss). Obviously, life gets stickier and more complicated as we age. And for many of us, the childhood wellsprings of joy shrink to a trickle. A recent Pew Research Center national survey found that only one-third of American adults are able to describe themselves as very happy.

Luckily, several new studies suggest a good way to shift that statistic: Take a few happiness lessons from the kids in your life — and the kid you once were. Here's a short refresher course.

Lesson 1: Start Small
"In church, I explained to Erin, my 3 year old, that when you pray, you quietly thank God for all of the good things you have in your life," says Maureen Ahearn, 34, of Syosset, NY, who also has a 6 year old son. "I asked her later what she prayed about, and she said, 'My cup.' She loves one in particular because it has princesses on it. I think of Erin and her cup when I'm annoyed by something, and I always feel better." Happiness and an appreciation for the small stuff are related, according to Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., psychology professor at the University of California, Riverside, and head of its Positive Psychology Laboratory. "Happy people report that they enjoy simple things like a sunny day or having lunch with a friend," she observes. They also take less for granted, and they're more grateful. A 2003 study showed that people who regularly take note of the positive things in their lives feel more overall satisfaction, more connection with others, and greater optimism than those who focus on their burdens.

Lyubomirsky recommends consciously "savoring the moment" — pausing to appreciate the positive components, large and small, of your life. But don't take the savoring itself for granted, she cautions. She asked two groups of people to regularly write down five things for which they were grateful. One group wrote three times a week, one wrote weekly, and a third control group didn't write at all. Only the once a week blessing counters reported feeling significantly happier — probably, Lyubomirsky thinks, because they avoided slipping into mindless routine.

Lesson 2: Play Hard
That kids are so often on the move — scrambling up a jungle gym, hurling themselves into a game of dodgeball — is part of the reason they are so upbeat. The mood-enhancing effect of physical activity has been well documented: In one study, 9 and 10 year old children reported feeling happier after 15 minutes of moderate exercise than after passively watching a 15 minute video. An even shorter burst of exercise is enough to change an adult's state of mind, according to researchers at Northern Arizona University; they found that just 10 minutes of aerobic activity improves mood, increases vigor, and lowers fatigue in adults. And the benefits of exercise are lasting, says Edward McAuley, Ph.D., a professor of kinesiology (the study of human movement) at the University of Illinois at UrbanaChampaign. He asked research subjects to engage in moderate activities, such as walking and stretching, three times a week, gradually increasing each session from 10 to 40 minutes. After five years, those who continued to be active were not only fitter, but happier. "Physical activity has a positive effect on people's perceptions of their own capabilities, which in turn increases their sense of wellbeing," McAuley says. "And this isn't about running marathons. Moderate, brisk activity can be just as effective in getting these results." Instead of simply adding treadmill time to your daily routine, opt for a kidstyle workout — the physical play that experts call "active leisure." Rather than plopping down in front of the television, invite your kids outside for a Frisbee toss or a run through the sprinklers. Take a walk with your spouse, play with your dog. Or follow Maureen Ahearn's lead: "I doubt that I would blast silly music and dance around the house if it weren't for my kids," she says. "That's a mood booster any day!"

Lesson 3: Listen to Your Body
"Sometimes my 3 year old son will tell me, mournfully, 'I just need to cry right now!'" says Adrienne Boxer, 32, of Portland, OR. "So I let him, and after his venting session, he's back to normal. Kids know when they need a good cry, a nap, or a snack." Adults can profit from reconnecting with that kind of natural self-regulation, says Lyubomirsky, especially when it comes to getting enough rest. "We focus on diet and exercise," she says. "But Americans get way too little sleep, and that's just as important." A University of Pennsylvania study found that people allowed to sleep only four and a half hours a night for a week felt sadder, angrier, and more stressed than people who got a full night's sleep (about eight hours). And an analysis of 56 sleep studies showed that sleep deprivation affects mood more than it affects either cognitive skills or physical performance.

So how does a busy mom get more (or at least better) sleep? First, get enough daily sunlight, since changes in light signal the brain to regulate your sleep-wake cycle. At night, make sure the kids' bedtime is at least two hours before yours. Don't exercise too close to bedtime. And while it may seem like a good idea to wait until the kids are asleep to motor through household chores, you'll pay in the long run with exhaustion and stress. Kids will choose a happy parent over a tidy house any day.

Lesson 4: Get Creative
"Two Halloweens ago, when he was 4, our son, Cinco, asked to be 'a dog named Chocolate driving a Subaru,'" says Jenifer Walter, 37, of New York City. "It was wonderful to see him in his one-of-a-kind costume, driving his cardboard car through a sea of red Power Rangers. He's totally himself, unafraid of being different."

Children don't often suffer from writer's block, or freeze in front of an easel not knowing what to paint. Tapping into the unfettered creativity we had as kids — when no inner critic yammered in our heads — can make life more pleasurable.

"Many studies have shown that creativity is associated with positive mood, even joy," says James Kaufman, Ph.D., a professor of psychology and director of the Learning Research Institute at California State University at San Bernardino. "Other studies have shown that people who express themselves in writing on a regular basis are less depressed, take fewer bad risks (like smoking), and visit doctors for physical ailments less often." Writing reduces physical and mental stress, Kaufman says, because creating a narrative orders our thoughts. You don't have to sit down and produce the Great American Novel; keeping a journal, blogging, or writing to a friend has the same positive effect.

"One of the hallmarks of creative activity is the feeling of flow — losing track of time because you're so involved in what you're doing," Kaufman points out. "If you experience flow, whether it's while you're amusing your child or cooking a meal, that's creative."

There are lots of ways to stoke your creativity. For example, the next time you need to buy something, make it instead — a birthday card, a loaf of bread, or a Halloween getup for next year. Or you could spend some time noticing how often you engage in creative problem solving even without realizing it.

Lesson 5: Explore More
The familiar sound loop of a 3yearold — "But why? But why? But why?" — may sometimes drive us bonkers, but in essence, it's worth emulating. Kids are dogged in their pursuit of knowledge. "My husband and I are amazed at our little gadget junkie, Larkin," says Deborah Helman, 34, of Houston. "He's just over a year old, and he's already figured out how to turn on the dishwasher and use the remote!" Larkin is as delighted as his parents when he acquires new skills by exploring. Curious people are more likely to be positive, explains research psychologist Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., of George Mason University. "They expose themselves to challenges that lead to the accumulation of knowledge or experience. This leads to improved skills, which leads to an increase in confidence and wellbeing."

But as we age, our natural sense of curiosity can wane. "We become more selfconscious and have a hard time deviating from planned activities," Kashdan says. We can, however, restore our openness to new experiences. Shake off negative preconceptions, he suggests, by going outside your comfort zone — even a short way. Talk to a stranger, eat something unfamiliar, choose books you'd normally ignore. "Afterward, come up with three things you liked about the new experience," Kashdan advises. In one study, people who said they didn't like country music were made to listen to it and then asked to list three things that were interesting about it. "Their whole perspective changed. It's important to withhold judgment and let your curiosity unfold naturally."


WebMD Feature from "Good Housekeeping" Magazine
By Jessica Baumgardner

Sourced By: TheSAMIGroup.com

10 Signs of an Ailing Mind

Experts describe the physical and mental signs that may indicate emotional distress.

Maybe you're having that proverbial "bad day" - or perhaps a rough few weeks: Feeling down, anxious, overstressed, as if you're one breath away from the "last straw."

If so, you may be surprised to learn it's quite common; doctors say it's part of the human condition.

"The presence of anxiety, of a depressive mood or of a conflict within the mind, does not stamp any individual as having a psychological problem because, as a matter of fact, these qualities are indigenous to the species," says Charles Goodstein, MD, clinical professor of psychiatry at NYU Medical Center in New York City.

But if living on the "last straw" has more or less become your way of life, experts say there's something on your mind that is crying out for your attention.

"The key is how often you are feeling this sense of distress, how bad it gets, and how long it lasts; that is what can help determine the seriousness of your situation," says Abby Aronowitz, PhD, the director of SelfHelpDirectives.com.

To help you gain some important perspective on the problems in your life, three experts helped WebMD put together this list of symptoms you should not ignore. If any of these signs seem true for you, speak to your family doctor and request a complete physical. If everything checks out OK, ask your doctor if you might benefit from professional counseling.

Sleep and Weight
1. Sleep disturbances. If you're sleeping more than usual or less than usual, if you can't fall asleep or wake up after only a few hours and can't go back to sleep, experts say emotional distress may be looming large in your life.

"If you have recurring disturbances of sleep more than once or twice a week, and there are no physical reasons your doctor can identify, your problem may be linked to a psychological problem -- most commonly, anxiety or depression," says Goodstein.

2. Dramatic weight fluctuations/changes in eating patterns. Have you gained or lost a significant amount of weight without any changes in your diet or exercise regime? Do you find yourself constantly thinking about food -- or repulsed by the thought of eating? If so, experts say it could be a sign of emotional distress.

"Constant preoccupation with food, weight, and body image is a sign that an eating disorder is sapping energy from other areas of life," says Aronowitz. In women and young girls a loss of menstruation in conjunction with changes in appetite can also be a sign of trouble.

Also look out for a lack of appetite. Goodstein says it can sometimes be a sign of depression.

Unusual Symptoms and Short Fuses
3. Unexplained physical symptoms. If, despite a complete physical workout and even a visit to a specialist or two, no one can find a reason behind your physical complaints, it may be your body's way of letting you know that your mind is in distress.

"Unusual symptoms that resist the million-dollar workup can be a sign that your body is expressing some kind of emotional upset," says Goodstein. Problems commonly linked to emotional distress can include headaches, a rumbling stomach, diarrhea, constipation, and chronic pain -- especially backaches.

4. Difficulty managing anger or controlling your temper. Are you fine when you're by yourself but frequently get provoked to an explosion by your spouse, children, friends, or co-workers? If so, you may be on stress overload, a situation that is dangerous to your physical and mental health -- and unhealthy for those around you.

"Not being able to control your anger is a sign of inability to manage feelings. And this is the one symptom that has the biggest impact on other people; children and women especially are affected," says Anie Kalayjian, EdD, RN, adjunct professor of psychology at Fordham University in New York City.

Generally, she says, folks who have anger-management problems do not recognize the symptoms because they feel fine when they are by themselves. "This is something that only comes into play in relation to another person -- so it's easy to blame the other person for what is really your symptom," Kalayjian tells WebMD.

Even if you don't see the signs in yourself, Kalayjian says consider counseling if your boss, co- workers, spouse, family, or friends are frequently telling you to calm down and watch your temper.

Obsessive, Tired, or Forgetful?
5. Compulsive/obsessive behaviors. Are you washing your hands -- or feel a compulsion to do so -- even though there's no logical reason? Has the fun gone out of life because you are constantly worrying that something bad is going to happen? Does it take you an hour or more to leave your home because you're bogged down with a series of "rituals" -- like touching things or rechecking locks, the stove, the iron? If so, you may have more anxiety in your life than you can handle alone.

"Obsessions are repetitive thoughts which resemble worry and are accompanied by anxiety. Compulsions are behavioral acts designed to eliminate the obsessions. And sometimes if your mind becomes so cluttered with obsessions, and your day so filled with compulsions, life as you know becomes completely taken over by anxiety and counterproductive rituals," says Aronowitz.

6. Chronic, tiredness, and lack of energy. "When the body cannot handle emotional overload, it simply begins to shut down. And that is often manifested by a sense of extreme tiredness and fatigue," says Kalayjian.

Goodstein adds that feeling too "beat" to do the things you used to love -- even when a physical checkup shows everything is alright -- can be a sign of emotional distress and depression.

7. Memory problems. Lots of things can temporarily interfere with your memory, from the hormonal changes of menopause, to a preoccupation with a work problem, to a lack of sleep. But it can also be caused by stress, a reaction to a traumatic event, or sometimes an illness such as Alzheimer's disease. How do you know the difference?

"You need a physical examination first and foremost," says Kalayjian. If everything checks out OK, she says, then anxiety, depression, or sometimes an unrecognized reaction to a traumatic event you have yet to deal with may be behind your forgetfulness.

Social Activity, Sex, and Mood
8. Shunning social activity. Did you love to go the movies with friends and now you don't? Do you seem fine at work but the minute you're home you jump into bed and just "veg out"? Are you turning down invitations because you simply feel better when you stay at home? Experts say all can be signs that your emotions may be getting the best of you.

"Any significant change in social behavior for a significant amount of time could indicate a stress overload or other emotional issues are at work," says Kalayjian.

Aronowitz adds that if phobias or fears of certain places or events are keeping you from doing what you want, then anxiety may be looming large in your life.

9. Sex is no longer fun. Are you going through the motions and not feeling the pleasure that sex once brought to your life? Do you love your partner, but just don't want to make love? If a physical checkup reveals everything is fine, then Kalayjian says an underlying depression, or an anxiety disorder, may be behind your slump.

"Diminished sexual desire and inability to feel joy in the sexual act itself can be a sign of emotional distress," she says. While that distress may be linked to your relationship with your partner, experts say just as often it could be linked to anxiety stemming from a totally different area of your life.

10. Mood swings and erratic behavior noticed by more than one person. While life may seem like "business as usual" to you, if friends or family members are commenting on your "moody" behavior, experts say pay attention.

"You have to listen to not only your own inner voice, but also listen to what you hear from your best friends, your neighbors, your spouse, your family. Others can have an observation of you that you cannot see," says Kalayjian. "The greater number of people telling you that something is wrong, the more you need to pay attention."

By Colette Bouchez
WebMD Feature

Sourced By: TheSAMIGroup.com

The Heart Speaks (Are You Listening?)

Loneliness, anger, and grief can break hearts as easily as high blood pressure. To heal the heart, feel the love.

A broken heart: It's the stuff of folk songs, the stuff of true love. There are plenty of couples who have died within weeks, months, or even days of each other. Johnny Cash's death certificate listed "complications from diabetes," but his fans know otherwise - he passed away just months after June's death.

Doctors will tell you, "broken heart syndrome" or stress-induced heart failure is a medical condition -- and a perfect example of the heart's power and vulnerability, writes Mimi Guarneri, MD, a practicing cardiologist and author of the new book, The Heart Speaks. "The condition seems to be caused by high evels of hormones that the body produces during severe stress, which can be temporarily toxic to the heart."

In her book, Guarneri weaves the latest medical knowledge with her own personal experiences -- hoping to spur conversations that pull people out of their stressful lifestyles. She wants to help them cope better with life-threatening emotions like grief, anger, anxiety, stress.

"I want people to start looking at their lives and see how these events, this stress, grief, anger has affected their health," she says.

Journey Into the Heart
Guarneri's own journey to understand the all-too-fragile heart began in childhood.

"On an evening when I was 8 years old, my vivacious 40-year-old mother told me she had pain in her chest, then got into bed and died of a heart attack," she writes. "My father's subsequent death from heart disease at 50, almost a decade later, was surely hastened by this tragedy in our family. Heart disease, with its layers of grief and guilt, stress and love, had blasted a hole through the center of my own family."

In her book, Guarneri introduces the relatively new science of psychoneuroimmunology, known in scientific circles simply as PNI. It is a study of the relationship between the nervous system, emotions, and immunity that has developed over the past decade -- an effort to understand how mind and body communicate, and the impact on our health.

This mind-body network has been studied over the past three decades. Until recently, however, some of the only measuring tools to show this link were EKGs, blood pressure, and blood tests of stress hormone levels.

When we experience anger or other emotions, it triggers a cascade of negative reactions throughout the body, says Guarneri. "We know that when we're angry, our bodies are surging with stress hormones that raise our blood pressure, heart rate, and stress hormone levels," she tells WebMD.

"When we give beta-blockers [medications] to slow the heart down, we're giving medication to stop stress hormones," she says. Her goal is to teach people to gain control over that stress and help them cope better without the drugs -- to learn to heal their own hearts.

In the last two years, a sophisticated form of technology -- called functional MRI -- has provided deeper insights into the mind-body connection, says Guarneri. Through functional MRI, scientists can now see for themselves, in real time, what has seemed so elusive -- that the thought-emotion centers of the brain are inextricably linked with the rest of the body, including the heart.

"This is one of the truly fascinating arenas of medicine," she tells WebMD. "We knew it intuitively, that mind and body were talking but now we are getting the science behind these things. We're just getting the medical technology to really understand it."

Guarneri cites 140 medical studies and other writings - a fraction of what's out there, she says -- shedding light on what she calls the "whole heart," which doctors and researchers must address to better serve their patients.

"They are the layers that don't appear on a stress test or electrocardiogram, that are not taught in medical school: the mental heart, affected by hostility, stress, and depression … the emotional heart, able to be crushed by loss and grief … the intelligent heart, with a nervous system all its own … the spiritual heart, which yearns for a higher purpose … and the universal heart, which communicates with others," she writes.

What Is the Heart, Really?
The ancient Greeks and Chinese believed the spirit resided in the heart. To the Egyptians, the heart was an inner book, storing a person's entire life - emotions, ideas, and memories. In the past century, scientists stripped the heart of its poetry; it was a mechanical pump, requiring extraordinary measures to fix.

Like those before her, Guarneri learned in medical school to block her emotions and treat the heart as a broken machine.

However, several memorable patients -- Russ, Paul, and Jean, whose stories are told in the book - opened her eyes to the value of looking deeper. She saw their vulnerability in the face of heart disease. "They didn't walk into my office on their own volition but were ushered in, ashen and terrified, having had a sobering glimpse of their own mortality," Guarneri writes.
She saw the effects of overwork, bad diet, loneliness -- the tensed faces, clenched fists, desperation, and anger. It was the beginning of her journey into mind-body medicine, the science that investigates the mind as an essential element in health and well-being.

"Behind every human being there's a life, a family, a history, and environment," Guarneri tells WebMD. "We're not just microbes on a plate; not everything can be fixed with Lipitor or a diuretic. It's not to say that those things aren't important. But in health care, we have lost the concept that we're dealing with human beings."

She also learned that patients were trying things like acupuncture to relieve stress. They asked questions she couldn't answer: How can I sleep without sleeping pills? How can I manage stress without sedatives? How can I lower blood pressure without taking medications that make me impotent?

In time, Guarneri founded the Scripps Center for Integrative Medicine in La Jolla, Calif., where patients can get such treatments as acupuncture, biofeedback, healing touch, massage, mindfulness-based stress reduction, and "stress mastery" - as well as sophisticated Western interventional cardiology treatments.

"I am not an alternative medicine doctor," she tells WebMD. "I look at the whole person - mind, body, spirit - and use the best of Western medicine and alternative medicine, the best of both worlds."

Mehmet Oz, MD, is director of cardiovascular services at Columbia University Medical Center in New York. He's been on Oprah, making the case for mind-body medicine; for bringing Eastern philosophies into Western medicine, especially yoga, massage, and guided imagery tapes.

"My patients wear headphones during open heart surgery… listening to tapes that prompt them to breathe deeply, feel less pain, feel less anxiety," he tells WebMD. "We know that patients have awareness during surgery. ... These tapes help them cope with the stress of surgery."

Consumers Driving the Movement
Health consumers and frustrated patients are pulling the nation's medical community into arenas of spirituality and alternative medicine, says Guarneri. "People are dissatisfied with conventional treatments. They're moving to treatments that are more conducive to their belief systems… and they believe that stress and their environment affect their health," she tells WebMD.

One government study showed that Americans were making twice as many visits to alternative and complementary providers, compared with primacy care doctors. The practices ranged from deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation to hypnosis, guided imagery, and meditation.

Michael Irwin, MD, professor of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences at UCLA's Geffen School of Medicine, is also director of the Cousins Center for Psychoneuroimmunology. It's a research center named for the late Norman Cousins, a journalist who, in the late 1970s, introduced Americans to the concept of holistic healing - that positive emotions can impact one's health.

"There has been increased interest in how the body communicates - specifically, how the immune system communicates -- with the brain," Irwin tells WebMD. He is investigating the link between emotions and immunity. As scientists have found with many diseases including heart disease, the process of inflammation is a central player.

"People who are depressed -- and who have heart disease -- are more likely to have higher levels of cytokines, molecules that are linked with immunity and with inflammation," he explains. "There's good evidence from animal studies that increased levels of cytokines put people at risk for depression, which becomes a vicious cycle that leads to greater heart disease."

Through functional MRI, researchers "can examine very precisely how people respond to a change… exactly how their brain activity is altered when they relax or if they have higher cytokine levels," explains Irwin. "As a medical doctor, I want to know how these findings affect my patients - and people with heart disease may be more sensitive to stressors. Depressed people are more sensitive to stressors. Until we understand that, we can't develop new treatments."

Irwin's studies have looked at the effects of tai chi on the immune system, he says. A new grant from the National Institute on Aging will be used to study effects of tai chi in improving insomnia by improving inflammation and cytokine levels.

The Little Brain
But here's the reality of our lives: When we're flying down the freeway -- and someone cuts in - the first reaction is to blast the horn, yell a few choice words. "We've all seen men go into road rage, a totally instinctive reaction," says Guarnier.

When we react on instinct, it's the amygdala region of the brain doing the driving. That's the brain center that stores old memories, she explains. "When someone pushes your buttons, you react immediately; you're reacting to something else that happened long ago. When it's such a quick reaction, you haven't had time to process." In her book, Guarneri talks about the "heart brain" -- the heart's ability to communicate with the rest of the body. The heart is a gland that produces hormones and chemicals, like dopamine and adrenaline, which are involved in emotions, she explains.

"While we may believe the brain is our decision maker and ruler, the 10-ounce heart is more powerful than we ever imagined - functioning as a sensory organ, hormone-producing gland, and information-processing center," she writes.

At the Institute for HeartMath, a nonprofit research and education organization, researchers have studied the heart-brain communication system. That research shows that it's possible to retrain how your heart-brain connection to produce a more stable heart rhythm, Guarneri explains.

Negative emotions like rage and frustration will trigger changes in the heart rhythm - creating a chaotic heart pattern that adversely affects the whole body, she explains. However, positive feelings like appreciation and love can produce a stable heart rhythm, which trains other organs to function optimally, she adds.

HeartMath has developed a core technique to do just that called Freeze Frame. When in a stressful situation, you must stop the moment "as if you're freezing a frame in a movie," says Guarneri. Then consciously shift to a positive emotion in order to reverse the effects of hostility or stress.

"People who are able to practice this self-management technique are able to generate consistent changes in their heart rhythm," she writes. "By consciously shifting to a positive emotion, they can reverse the negative effects on the heart."

"If you're in an angry, frustrated state, your body is producing stress hormones that are creating a chaotic heart rhythm," Guarneri explains. "There's an outpouring of adrenaline and cortisol that increases heart rate, blood pressure, and make platelets stickier, all of which can cause a heart attack."

"An animal reacts on instinct," Guarnier tells WebMD. "Reining that in ... that's what separates us from dogs."

By Jeanie Lerche Davis
WebMD Feature

Sourced By: TheSAMIGroup.com

Meditate To Concentrate

Science Daily — Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania say that practicing even small doses of daily meditation may improve focus and performance.

Meditation, according to Penn neuroscientist Amishi Jha and Michael Baime, director of Penn's Stress Management Program, is an active and effortful process that literally changes the way the brain works. Their study is the first to examine how meditation may modify the three subcomponents of attention, including the ability to prioritize and manage tasks and goals, the ability to voluntarily focus on specific information and the ability to stay alert to the environment.
In the Penn study, subjects were split into two categories. Those new to meditation, or "mindfulness training," took part in an eight-week course that included up to 30 minutes of daily meditation. The second group was more experienced with meditation and attended an intensive full-time, one-month retreat.
Researchers found that even for those new to the practice, meditation enhanced performance and the ability to focus attention. Performance-based measures of cognitive function demonstrated improvements in a matter of weeks. The study, to be published in the journal Cognitive, Affective, & Behavioral Neuroscience, suggests a new, non-medical means for improving focus and cognitive ability among disparate populations and has implications for workplace performance and learning.

Participants performed tasks at a computer that measured response speeds and accuracy. At the outset, retreat participants who were experienced in meditation demonstrated better executive functioning skills, the cognitive ability to voluntarily focus, manage tasks and prioritize goals. Upon completion of the eight-week training, participants new to meditation had greater improvement in their ability to quickly and accurately move and focus attention, a process known as "orienting." After the one-month intensive retreat, participants also improved their ability to keep attention "at the ready."
The results suggest that meditation, even as little as 30 minutes daily, may improve attention and focus for those with heavy demands on their time. While practicing meditation may itself may not be relaxing or restful, the attention-performance improvements that come with practice may paradoxically allow us to be more relaxed.

The research was supported by the National Institutes of Health and the Penn Stress Management Program.
Note: This story has been adapted from a news release issued by University of Pennsylvania.

Sourced By: TheSAMIGroup.com

His and Hers Stress Advice

When men get stressed, their natural response leans toward flight or fight. Do they turn tail and run or stick around and gut it out?

When women get stressed, the theory is they either tend or befriend -- that is, nurture those around them or reach out to others.

Men and women clearly react to stress differently. So when it comes time to decompress, their ways of unwinding differ as well.

"Managing stress is often different by sex," says Carl Pickhardt, PhD, a psychologist and author of The Everything Parent's Guide to Positive Discipline. "Women often seek support to talk out the emotional experience, to process what is happening and what might be done. Men often seek a companionship activity to get relief from stress, to create a relaxing diversion or escape."

Whether it's a support group or a compassionate friend, a round of golf or a run in the park, experts give WebMD practical tips for both sexes on how to unwind when stress strikes.

Stress Tips for Women
It was only a few years ago that the "tend or befriend" theory was developed by a leading psychologist in the field, Shelly E. Taylor, PhD, a distinguished professor in the department of psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles. The study, published in the July 2000 issue of Psychological Review, reported that women were more likely to deal with stress by taking care of their loved ones, or by leaning on a friend or family member for support.

With this new theory tailored just for women serving as a guideline for how they can deal with stress, experts offer these tips:

Develop a first aid kit for stress. "Since women are so relationship dependent, it's important for them to have a strong support system in place," says Carol Goldberg, PhD, a clinical psychologist specializing in stress management. "It's just like having a first aid kit for when you cut your finger --having this support system in place is a first aid kit for stress that you can count on in an emergency."

Make sure that your support system is effective. "Whether its relatives or friends, seek out people who are good for you in a stressful situation," says Goldberg, who hosts a weekly television program in New York. "You need people who don't panic under pressure, who aren't depressed, and who aren't worst-case-scenario thinkers. Make sure the people you have around you when you're stressed handle it well."

Find a friend who can keep a secret. "It's important that the people you have around you can respect your privacy when you're stressed," says Goldberg.

Tell your story. "When it helps, tell your story," Goldberg tells WebMD. "If you are among the women who feel better talking about stress, don't keep it bottled up. Instead, get out with a trusted friend who will lend a compassionate ear. And avoid obsessing, which can depress you both."

Say "no" when you're stressed. Women tend to put on a superwoman cape when they're stressed, doing too much for too many people and forgetting about themselves in the meantime. This, clearly, is something to avoid. "Women can selflessly help too much at their own costs," says Pickhardt, who is a spokesman for the American Psychological Association. So remember to put yourself first when you're feeling stressed.

Say "yes" to the simple things in life. "Say 'yes' to investing in yourself for replenishment of energy, personal renewal, and regular relaxation," says Pickhardt. Take a long, hot bath when you're feeling stressed, or go for a walk, spend a day with a friend, or read a book -- anything that is all about you.

Men and women react to stress very differently, so when it comes time to decompress, each gender turns to their own bag of tricks.

Stress Tips for Men
When men are stressed, it's the tried-and-true flight-or-fight theory that they turn to. Here are stress-reduction tips for men that will help them relax when they need it most:

Exercise! "Very often, men tend to get rid of the tension and adrenaline by doing something physical, like jogging," says Goldberg. Hitting the gym for an hour works, too -- anything that gets your blood flowing and your heart rate pumping.

Spend time with the guys. Golfing, softball, or any team sport that let's a guy escape his stress is a good way to unwind. "Men often seek a companionship activity like golfing or getting outdoors to get relief from stress, to create a relaxing diversion or escape," says Pickhardt.

Spend time alone. When a guy is de-stressing, their activity of choice can include some time flying solo as well. "It doesn't have to be an activity that a man shares with others, it can be solitary as well, like hiking, photography, or fishing," says Pickhardt.

Build a first aid kit. "While relationships are important for women when it comes to stress, that doesn't mean men don't need their own first aid kit," says Goldberg. So the same tips apply for men, too: When you're stressed, surround yourself with people you trust and who can help you deal with your problems.

Tips for Men and Women
"People respond to stress differently, and they perceive it differently," says Paul Rosch, MD, who is president of the American Institute of Stress. "So there is no one universal stress-reduction strategy for everyone. While women are more apt to take a bath and do aromatherapy, and men are more apt to go jogging, you can't define what one or the other should do because it's so different for each person."

Whether you're a man or a woman, here are stress-reduction tips that apply to everyone:

Understand what you can and can't control. "Identify those things in your life that are stressful and put them in one of two categories: Is this something I can't avoid or do anything about, or something in which I can make a difference?" says Rosch, who is also a clinical professor of medicine and psychiatry at the New York Medical College. "Use your time and talents effectively on those things that you can control so you're not constantly frustrated."

Man's best friend. "For both men and women, when you talk about companionship, that can mean your pet as well," says Goldberg. Take your dog jogging, or spend some time on your couch relaxing with your cat.

Listen to the music. "Music is good for both men and women when they're stressed," says Goldberg. "Just pick something you really like and listen to a bunch of music." It's a simple way to unwind.

Find a new hobby. "Some people really get involved with their hobbies," says Goldberg. "Any kind of hobby they can just go and do is great -- it gets their mind off their stress."

Take care of yourself. Most importantly, "Make self-care a priority," says Pickhardt. "Someone who won't invest in his or her own self-care is destined to run down into stress."

http://www.webmd.com/Heather-Hatfield

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Why Some People React Aggressively Without Provocation While Others Don't

Science Daily — Specific personality variables, such as anger or irritability predict the tendency to either engage in aggressive behavior willingly or to engage in aggressive behavior when provoked, according to a recent meta-analysis in the September issue of Psychological Bulletin, published by the American Psychological Association (APA).

In a review of 63 studies, psychologist Ann Bettencourt, PhD and coauthors Amelia Talley, MA, University of Missouri – Columbia, Arlin James Benjamin, PhD, Panhandle State University, and Jeffery Valentine, PhD, Duke University, examined the association between personality variables and aggressive behavior, under provoking and relatively neutral conditions. The following personality variables were identified: trait aggressiveness, trait irritability, trait anger, Type A personality, dissipation-rumination, emotional susceptibility (tendency to feel inadequate or vulnerable), narcissism, and impulsivity. Study participants ranging from 7 years old to 48 years old were subjected to different types of provoking situations such as verbal insults, frustration in the form of difficult puzzles, physical aggression, loud noises and disparaging comments. Neutral comparison conditions were similar to those in the provoking conditions but lacked insulting, irritating, and frustrating situations.
Persons identified as having an aggressive and irritable personality were more likely to engage in aggressive behavior regardless of whether situations were provoking. “This may suggest that these persons have the capacity to engage in cold-blooded style of aggressive behavior, reacting harshly as a result to little or no agitation” said lead author B. Ann Bettencourt.

The review also found that personality variables, and the level of provocation, interact to influence aggressive behavior. For instance, people who are Type A personalities, have a tendency to express anger (trait anger), have self-destructive tendencies and mull-over upsetting situations, are emotional susceptible, narcissistic and for the most part impulsive were more likely to behave aggressively only under provoking conditions. This type of reaction is considered “hot-blooded” because a person is usually upset by the provoking situation, which induces the aggressive behavior. Bettencourt and her colleagues labeled the two different patterns of associations between personality and aggressive behavior as aggression-prone and provocation-sensitive.

“Problems with aggression and violence continue to plague people’s interpersonal life, their intergroup interactions, and society in general. Social scientists need to develop a better understanding of the complex dynamics among personality variables, situational variables, and aggressive behavior to gain a better understanding of human aggression. The knowledge gained from further research will refine therapeutic and policy interventions aimed at reducing aggression and violence,” stated Bettencourt.
Article: “Personality and Aggressive Behavior Under Provoking and Neutral Conditions: A Meta- Analytic Review,” B. Ann Bettencourt, PhD, Amelia Talley, MA, University of Missouri – Columbia; Arlin James Benjamin, PhD, Panhandle State University; Jeffery Valentine, PhD, Duke University; Psychological Bulletin, Vol.132 No.5.
Note: This story has been adapted from a news release issued by American Psychological Association.

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Simmer Down Anger to Avoid Injury

Anger Makes Injuries More Likely, Study Shows

Jan. 31, 2006 -- When anger bubbles up, cooling it back down could help you stay safe.
Injuries often follow anger, researchers report in the Annals of Family Medicine. They found that people tended to report feeling particularly angry right before getting injured.

The study included more than 2,400 injured people in Boone County, Mo. The researchers included David Vinson, MD, MSPH, of the University of Missouri-Columbia's department of family and community medicine.

Shortly after emergency treatment for their wounds, patients were asked about their emotions just before their injury and a day earlier. Both men and women generally admitted feeling angrier right before their injuries.

Primed for Injury
Anger was especially linked to intentional injuries, including fight wounds. But anger wasn't linked to injuries from falls or traffic accidents.

How angry were the injured people? Nearly a third reported feeling some degree of irritation right before their injury. Almost one in five reported feeling "angry" (18%) and more than one in 10 reported feeling "hostile" in that same moment (13%) -- at levels ranging from "a little" to "extremely."

It's normal to feel anger. How you handle your feelings may be what matters most. If anger often runs high, counseling may show new solutions.

Alcohol and anger were an explosive mix in Vinson's study. "Drinking during the previous six hours was strongly associated with injury risk," the researchers write.

Low Boil
Were the injured people particularly hotheaded? To find out, the researchers interviewed more than 1,800 uninjured people in the same area.

Those people expressed a surprising amount of anger, Vinson's team found. A third of uninjured participants described themselves as "irritable," and more than one in 10 called themselves "angry." Most noted mild anger -- below the threshold tied to injury risk.

In both groups, men were more likely than women to call themselves angry, the study shows.

"Anger is a complex emotion," write Vinson and colleagues, who call their findings "tentative." It's hard to study anger as it unfolds, and people may misremember their true emotions -- especially after getting hurt by someone else -- the researchers note.

http://www.webmd.com/Miranda-Hitti

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Anger And Hostility Speed Up Decline In Lung Power

Science Daily — Longstanding anger and hostility compromise lung function and hasten the natural decline in lung power that is a normal part of aging, reveals research published ahead of print in Thorax.

The authors base their findings on a study of 670 men, taking part in the long term US Normative Aging Study. Their ages ranged from 45 to 86, but the average age was 62.
Their levels of hostility were measured in 1986, using a validated scoring system The average hostility score was around 18.5, but ranged from 7 to 37.
After this initial assessment, the men were monitored for an average of eight years, during which their lung function was measured on three separate occasions.
The men's lung function at the start of the study varied according to their initial levels of hostility.
It was significantly poorer among those men deemed to exhibit high levels of anger and hostility compared with those who exhibited medium to low levels.
But it was also worse at each examination throughout the period of study.

Although the impact was lessened, the association held true even after taking account of factors likely to influence the findings, such as smoking and educational attainment.
Higher levels of hostility were also associated with a faster rate of the natural decline in lung function that occurs with aging.
Each point increase in hostility score was associated with a loss of FEV1 -- the volume of air that can be forced out of the lungs in one second, and a measure of lung power -- of 9 ml a year compared with men whose hostility levels were lower.
The authors point out that hostility and anger have been associated with cardiovascular disease, death, and asthma, and that previous research has suggested that changes in mood can have short term effects on the lungs.
Anger and hostility will alter neurological and hormonal processes, which in turn may disturb immune system activity, producing chronic inflammation, suggest the authors.
An accompanying editorial comments that the physiological components of anger and stress overlap, and stress is well known to affect the immune system.

"Indeed it is hard to find a disease for which emotion or stress plays absolutely no part in symptom severity, frequency, or intensity of flare-ups," writes Dr Paul Lehrer of the University of Medicine and Dentistry in New Jersey, USA.
Chronic anger may permanently alter the normal body responses to and physical and psychological stressors, he suggests, and add to "wear and tear."
But he cautions that associations do not necessarily equate to cause. "Personality, as well as physiology, can change over time, and deterioration in health and physical function can lead to negative emotion as well as vice versa, including for respiratory diseases."

Note: This story has been adapted from a news release issued by BMJ Specialty Journals

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Stress and Teens: Know the Signs

What is stress?
Stress is what you feel when you react to pressure from others or from yourself. Pressure can come from anywhere, including school, work, activities, friends, and family members. You can also feel stress from the pressure of wanting to get good grades or wanting to feel like you belong. Stress comes in many forms and everyone feels stress.

How does my body handle stress?
Your body has a built-in response to handle stress. When something stressful happens, you may experience sweaty palms, dry mouth, or knots in your stomach. This is totally normal and means that your body is working exactly as it should. Other signs of stress include emotional signs such as feeling sad or worried, behavioral (your actions) signs such as not feeling up to doing things, and mental (your mind) signs such as not being able to concentrate or focus.

What causes stress?

Is stress always a bad thing?
No! A little bit of stress can work in a positive way. For instance, during a sports competition, stress might push you to perform better. Also, without the stress of deadlines, you might not be able to finish schoolwork or get to where you need to be on time.

What are signs that you have too much stress or are stressed out?
Signs that you are stressed out
feeling down, edgy, guilty or tired
having headaches or stomachaches
having trouble sleeping
laughing or crying for no reason
blaming others for bad things that happen to you
wanting to be alone all the time (withdrawal).
not being able to see the positive side of a situation
not enjoying activities that you used to enjoy
feeling resentful of people or things you have to do
feeling like you have too many things you have to do
Some of these signs can also be signs of a more serious condition called depression.
Are you stressed about your body?
During adolescence, your body is going through many changes that are happening at a fast pace. These changes might make you feel unsure of yourself at times, or stressed. They might make you worry about your size and wanting to fit in with the rest of the crowd.

Do you worry about the same thing other girls do?
Why am I taller than most of the boys my age?
Why haven’t I grown any?
Am I too skinny?
Am I overweight?
Why is my weight going up and down?
Am I normal? Will others like me now that I am changing?
My breasts are too small.
My breasts are too large
Why am I so emotional?
Why am I getting pimples?
Do my clothes look right on my body?
That new dress style doesn’t fit me – my friends won’t think I’m cool.


During puberty, not only will you get taller, you will also see other changes in your body such as wider hips, bottoms, and thighs. Because your body is starting to produce new hormones (like estrogen), your weight may change and your body, which has both muscle and fat, will also start to have more fat compared to muscle than it did before. Changes in estrogen levels can also cause mood swings – especially around your period.

Try not to worry! Each woman changes at her own pace and all of these new changes are normal. While you are experiencing these changes keep your self- confidence up by taking good care of yourself, eating healthy foods and getting regular exercise. Remember…you are unique and beautiful…just as you are.

What are ways you can handle stress?
Different people are stressed by different things. For example:

You might get upset or stressed when you don’t make good grades but your friend might not.
You might be able to handle doing homework and being involved in after-school activities but your sister or friend might feel they can’t do both.
Your friend might see moving to a new house as a stress but you might view it as an adventure.
There are no right or wrong things to stress over – there are just differences in what we consider to be stressful. No matter what stresses you out, there are many things you can try to help you deal.

11 Tips for Dealing with Stress
1) Put your body in motion.
Moving from the chair to the couch while watching TV is not being physically active! Physical activity is one of the most important ways to keep stress away by clearing your head and lifting your spirits. Physical activity also increases endorphin levels – the natural "feel-good" chemicals in the body that leave you with a naturally happy feeling.

Whether you like full-fledged games of football, tennis, or roller hockey, or you prefer walks with family and friends, it's important to get up, get out, and get moving!

2) Fuel up.
If your body was a car, you wouldn't go for a long drive without filling up the gas tank first. Likewise, begin each day by eating breakfast to give you the energy you need to tackle the day. Eating regular meals (this means no skipping dinner) and taking time to enjoy them (nope, eating in the car on the way to practice doesn't count) will make you feel better too.

Make sure to fuel up with fruits, vegetables, proteins (peanut butter, a chicken sandwich, or a tuna salad) and grains (wheat bread, pasta, or some crackers) – these will give you the power you need to make it through those hectic days.

Don't be fooled by the jolt of energy you get from sodas and sugary snacks – this only lasts a short time, and once it wears off, you may feel sluggish and more tired than usual. For that extra boost of energy to sail through history notes, math class, and after school activities, grab a banana, some string cheese, or a granola bar for some power-packed energy!

3) LOL (Laugh out loud)!
Some say that laughter is the best medicine – well, in many cases, it is! Did you know that it takes 15 facial muscles to laugh? Lots of laughing can make you feel good – and, that good feeling can stay with you even after the laughter stops. So, head off stress with regular doses of laughter by watching a funny movie or cartoons, reading a joke book (you may even learn some new jokes), or even make up your own riddles – laughter can make you feel like a new person!

Everyone has those days when they do something really silly or stupid – instead of getting upset with yourself, laugh out loud! No one's perfect! Life should be about having fun. So, lighten up!

4) Have fun with friends.
Being with people you like is always a good way to ditch your stress. Get a group together to go to the movies, shoot some hoops, listen to music, or play a board game – or just hang out and talk. Friends can help you work through your problems and let you see the brighter side of things.

5) Spill to someone you trust.
Instead of keeping your feelings bottled up inside, talk to someone you trust or respect about what's bothering you. It could be a friend, a parent, a friend's parent, someone in your family or from your religious community, or a teacher. Talking out your problems and seeing them from a different view might help you figure out ways to deal with them. Just remember, you don't have to go at it alone!

6) Take time to chill.
Pick a comfy spot to sit and read, daydream, or even take a snooze. Listen to your favorite music. Work on a relaxing project like putting together a puzzle or making jewelry.

Stress can sometimes make you feel like a tight rubber band – stretched to the limit! If this happens, take a few deep breaths to help yourself unwind. If you're in the middle of an impossible homework problem, take a break! Finding time to relax after (and sometimes during) a hectic day or week can make all the difference.

7) Catch some zzz’s ...
Fatigue is a best friend to stress. When you don't get enough sleep, it's hard to deal – you may feel tired, cranky, or you may have trouble thinking clearly. When you're overtired, a problem may seem much bigger than it actually is. You may have a hard time doing a school assignment that usually seems easy, you don't do your best in sports or any physical activity, or you may have an argument with your friends over something really stupid.

Sleep is a big deal! Getting the right amount of sleep is especially important for kids your age. Most teens need between 8.5 and just over 9 hours of sleep each night. Because your body (and mind) is changing and developing, it requires more sleep to re-charge for the next day. So don't resist, get those zzz's!

8) Keep a journal.

If you're having one of those crazy days when nothing goes right, it's a good idea to write things down in a journal to get it off your chest – like how you feel, what's going on in your life, and things you'd like to accomplish. You could even write down what you do when you're faced with a stressful situation, and then look back and think about how you handled it later. So, find a quiet spot, grab a notebook and pen, and start writing!

9) Get it together.

Too much to do but not enough time? Forgot your homework? Feeling overwhelmed or forgetful? Being unprepared for school, practice, or other activities can make for a very stressful day!

Getting everything done can be a challenge, but all you have to do is plan a little and get organized.

10) Lend a hand.
Get involved in an activity that helps others. It's almost impossible to feel stressed out when you're helping someone else. It's also a great way to find out about yourself and the special talents you never knew you had! Signing up for a service project is a good idea, but helping others is as easy as saying hello, holding a door, or volunteering to keep a neighbor's pet. If you want to get involved in a more organized volunteer program, try working at a local recreation center, or helping with an after school program. The feeling you will get from helping others is greater than you can imagine! Find volunteer opportunities here.

11) Learn ways to better deal with anger.
It is totally normal to be angry sometimes – everyone gets mad at some point. And as a teen, the changing hormones in your body can cause you to feel mad for what seems like no good reason sometimes. The important thing is to deal with your anger in a healthy way. It will help to cool down first and then focus on positive solutions to problems. This will help you to communicate better with the people in your life, and you can even earn more respect along the way. So, the next time something really has you stressed out, try these steps from TeensHealth:

Try to calm yourself down before doing or saying anything.
Tell the other person what the problem is and how it makes you feel.
Try to think of some solutions. What would the good and bad results of those solutions be?
Explain your solution to the person you are upset with and try to put it into action together.
Explain your solution to the other person and, together, try to put it into action.

How can you deal with the stress of a disaster, or a violent or tragic event?
Sometimes we are part of or have lived through a very stressful event such as a hurricane, a serious car accident, or an assault, like date rape. These kind of scary events can cause a very strong stress reaction in the victims but the reactions may be different for each person. Some become cranky or depressed; others can't sleep or have nightmares, some may keep reliving the experience, some might experience nervousness and their hearts might race, and some people put the event out of their minds. Feelings that lead to this type of stress include fear, a sense that your life is in danger, helplessness or horror.

You don’t have to be hurt to experience this type of stress, You can simply be a witness to the event or be threatened with physical harm to have this type of stressful reaction.

Whether or not you were directly affected by a traumatic event, it is normal to feel nervous about your own safety and wonder how you would react in an emergency. Here are some things you can do to handle this special kind of stress:

You may think it feels better to pretend the event did not happen, but it is best to be honest about how you are feeling. Ignoring or hiding your feelings can be worse for your health in the long run. It is okay to feel scared and uncertain.
Try to remember that, while you might feel like a changed person and everything seems off balance right now, your life will calm down and you will find a new normal groove.

Talk to a teacher, your parents, or a counselor about your sadness, anger, and other emotions. It can be tough to get started, but it is important to confide in someone you trust with your thoughts and feelings.
It is common to want to strike back at people who have caused you or those you love great pain. This feeling is normal, but it is important to understand that it is useless to respond with more violence. Nothing good can come from using hateful words or actions.

While you will always remember and feel changed by the event, the feelings will become less painful over time. In learning to cope with tragedy, you will become stronger and better at handling stressful situations. You may also find yourself appreciating life and the people you love even more.
Can stress lead to more serious problems?
Yes! Struggling with major stress and low self-esteem issues can contribute to more serious problems such as eating disorders, hurting yourself, depression, alcohol and drug abuse, and even suicide. Continued depression and thoughts about hurting or killing yourself are signs that it is time to seek help. Talk to an adult you trust right away!

WebMD Public Information from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services

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Anger Management: Counting to 10 and Beyond

Even though counting to 10 still works, it helps to add a few extra anger management techniques to your arsenal. Find out more.

From rude drivers to anonymous hackers to co-workers that make your job harder than it should be, it seems that everyone is getting on your nerves and you're about to lose whatever hold you have left on your temper. What to do? Learn some anger management techniques. Here are a few that might help.

It Worked for Jefferson!
Simple as it may sound, you may want to start with some age-old advice.

"When angry, count to 10 before you speak. If very angry, a hundred," said Thomas Jefferson. That's still good advice, says Dan Johnston, PhD, an assistant professor of psychiatry and behavioral science at Mercer University School of Medicine in Macon, Ga.

"The familiar childhood admonition of 'counting to 10' before taking action works because it emphasizes the two key elements of anger management -- time and distraction," says Johnston.

"The familiar technique of counting to 10 not only provides the time needed for delay but also offers a distraction from the anger-arousing event," says Johnston. "While busily counting, we are not mentally adding fuel to the fire of anger by mulling over whatever happened."

Counting to 10 becomes an even more effective way of disarming anger if we also take a slow deep breath between each number, Johnston adds. "Deep breathing counteracts the fight or flight stress reaction that underlies anger. Deliberately taking a slow, deep breath not only brings a soothing sense of relaxation, but also helps us to focus our attention in the present moment."

The "energy" of anger often leads to impulsive behavior that only aggravates an already tense situation, Johnston tells WebMD. If given enough time to cool off, however, most people can learn to control their initial impulses.

Three Keys to Defusing Anger
Once more relaxed and in control, Johnston says, we're ready to "respond," which is the key word in dealing with anger. "Don't react," says Johnston. "Respond. Make a carefully considered choice about the best course of action to take and guide your response by the three anger-regulating principles of empathy, compassion, and assertion."

Empathy is the ability to see a situation from another person's point of view, Johnston tells WebMD. "Adopting an empathic stance opens the door to compassion by providing for a deeper emotional understanding of the source of conflict. Being compassionate in an anger-arousing situation allows for the deliberate choice of a tolerant but assertive response to resolving the conflict."

Choosing to respond assertively is different from the impulsive reaction of acting-out anger, Johnston says. An assertive response is characterized by standing up for our legitimate rights, but it does so in a manner that does not violate the rights of others. "Assertive behavior is a direct, honest, and appropriate expression of feelings and beliefs that helps to establish understanding, consensus, and cooperation."

Take One Step Back
To make sure you actually understand what you're angry about, paraphrase or clarify what the other person has said to you, says DeAnna Beckman, MSW, LISW, executive director of the Center for Threat Assessment at the University of Cincinnati College of Medicine. "This allows you to make sure you did not misunderstand the message," she tells WebMD, "and it focuses your brain on thinking, not reacting."

Beckman also suggests leaving the situation if necessary. "A simple, 'Can we discuss this later?' or, 'Can I get back to you on that?' can buy time to control your feelings. You can use that time to take a short walk or climb a flight or two of stairs to calm down," she says.

Now Five Steps Forward
Washington, D.C. therapist Mark Gorkin, LICSW, author of Practice Safe Stress: Healing and Laughing in the Face of Stress, Burnout & Depression, offers a five-step method for "constructive confrontation":

Use an "I" statement, question, or observation: "I'm concerned," "I'm confused," or "I'm frustrated" are good ways to begin your exchange.
Describe the problem specifically. Avoid judgmental accusations such as "You never get your work in on time." Instead, be specific: "I've asked you three times this week for the status of the systems report and I haven't received the report or any response. What's going on here?"
Explain why you're upset. Talk about effects and expectations. For example: "Because I didn't receive the report on time, I wasn't able to present it at the meeting and we had to postpone making a decision." That's the effect. The expectation: "We really need the data. I want to meet tomorrow morning at 9 to discuss where you are with the project."
Acknowledge the other person and ask for input. Let the other person know you have some understanding of what he's going through. For example: "I know you're working on several important projects. Tell me what's on your plate. Then we'll need to set priorities and upgrade the importance of this project."
Listen and let go. Once you've engaged in the first four steps, you can be more objective and can let go of any existing anger, hurt feelings, or questionable assumptions.
Practice Makes Perfect
All these techniques work well, but what happens when you're so angry you can't think to use them? Practice makes perfect, says Jason Kornrich, PhD, director of outpatient mental health services at Nassau University Medical Center in East Meadow, N.Y.

"You have to practice dealing with anger before you're actually angry," says Kornrich, who suggests you role-play a confrontational situation with a trusted family member, friend, or colleague.

This is also a good way to teach children how to deal with their anger, he tells WebMD. "You need to practice with them and show them how to deal with their anger. And you need to be a good role model yourself ... if you can't deal with your own anger, your kids won't be able to control themselves either."

Many of us seem to have a much shorter fuse these days, Kornrich says. "Between the after-effects of Sept. 11, the economy, the war in Iraq, the price of gas, the constant barrage of bad news on the television, the anger level we deal with every day has been increasing."

There are ways to minimize the stresses and irritations that build up, Kornrich says. For starters, stay off your cell phone while driving. "This can just make you doubly frustrated, while you're trying to deal with a conversation and traffic at the same time. This is a good prescription for road rage."

Knowing your weak points can also help you avoid situations that can push you over the edge. If you hate traffic, for example, go in to work earlier or come home later. If you need a breather between work and family responsibilities, go to the gym for an hour before going home. Too much bad news on TV? You can shut it off or change the channel. Also consider cutting down your hours on the Internet.

"On the Internet, inhibitions go out the window," Kornrich says. "It's a good vehicle for bullying other people because you're not face to face with the other person, and it becomes a dehumanizing experience." Too many hours on-line can also cause you to lose your social skills and graces for the "real world," he says, because you have fewer "training opportunities" for interacting with other people.

Of course, we can't avoid anger completely in our lives. "The key though," says Kornrich, "is to catch ourselves at step one or two, rather than wait till we hit step nine or 10."

By Carol Sorgen
WebMD Feature

Sourced By: TheSAMIGroup.com

Managing Job Stress - Topic Overview

Job stress comes in many different forms and affects your body in various ways. Minor sources of stress may include equipment that won't work or phones that won't quit ringing. Major stress comes from having too much work, not having enough work, doing work that is unfulfilling, fearing a job layoff, or not getting along with your boss.

Usually it is the major sources of stress that lead to burnout, causing people to become unhappy and less productive in their work. Job stress can affect your health and home life as well. Low levels of stress may not be noticeable; slightly higher levels can be positive and challenge you to act in creative and resourceful ways; and high levels can be harmful, contributing to chronic disease.

The major sources of job stress fall into seven categories:

Control. This factor is the most closely related to job stress. Studies show that workers who believe that they have a great deal of responsibility but little control or decision-making power in their jobs are at increased risk for cardiovascular disease and other stress-related illnesses.
Competence. Are you concerned about your ability to perform well? Are you challenged enough, but not too much? Do you feel secure in your job? Job insecurity is a major source of stress for many people.
Clarity. Feeling uncertain about what your duties are, how they may be changing, or what your department's or organization's goals are can lead to stress.
Communication. Workplace tension often results from poor communication, which in turn increases job stress. An inability to express your concerns, frustrations, or other emotions can also lead to increased stress.
Support. Feeling unsupported by your coworkers may make it harder to resolve other problems at work that are causing you stress.
Significance. If you don't find your job meaningful or take pride in it, you may find it stressful.
Increased responsibilities. Assuming additional responsibilities in your job can be stressful.
Managing job stress

Here are some options for lowering stress on the job:

Meet with your supervisor at least once a year (every 3 or 6 months is better) to talk about your performance and your job. If a performance review is already part of your job, treat it as a chance to clear up issues that may be causing stress for you.

Discuss the following:
What is expected of me in this position?
Where is this company going, and how do I fit into that plan?
How am I doing? What are my strengths? Areas for improvement?
What can I expect from you if a problem with my work or my job should occur?
If I continue my current high-quality performance, how and when can I expect to be rewarded?

Manage your time well. It's important to leave your job at the office, even if your office is a room in your home. If you give up free time to get more work done, you may pay for it with stress-related symptoms. If your employer offers a flexible work schedule, take advantage of it to fit your own work style. For instance, come in earlier to have a longer midday break or to make time for a yoga class or workout.

Unplug. Technologies such as cellular phones and the Internet have made it possible to be available to everyone, including clients and coworkers, at all times. Do not allow technology to eliminate the boundaries between your time and your employer's time. Leave your work cell phone behind when having it with you is not absolutely necessary, or decide not to answer it during times you have set aside for yourself or your family. Avoid checking work e-mail at home.

Know when to quit. If you are truly miserable because of a stressful job and the suggestions above have not worked, it may be time to think about changing jobs. Make sure you know whether it is you or the job that's the problem. Before quitting, spend time researching other job options. Being unemployed will probably also lead to stress. Getting another job before quitting is ideal, but sometimes that isn't possible. Decide what is less stressful for you: unemployment or being miserable in your current job.

WebMD Medical Reference from Healthwise

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Happy Couples: What It Takes to Be One

The sight of a couple sharing a joke and walking hand in hand, their faces lined with wrinkles, and their hair gray, begs the question: How did they remain a happy couple for so many years? Given that about half of all first marriages for men and women under 45 end in divorce, it’s a legitimate question. So at WebMD, we asked the experts to reveal the secrets of happy couples. Their revelations may surprise you.

“It’s not about how much you love each other, or how much money you have, or even if your personalities mesh,” says Howard Markman, PhD, leading marriage researcher, co-director of the Center for Marital and Family Studies at the University of Denver, and author of Fighting for Your Marriage: Positive Steps for Preventing Divorce and Preserving a Lasting Love.

Far more significant than these factors -- yes, even more important than heart-pounding lust, which, let’s face it, often fades over time -- is communication, says Markman. How well you and your spouse communicate with another? The second most significant factor that happy couples share, he says, is a strong friendship.

While you can’t necessarily teach a couple how to be friends, you can teach good friends how to communicate better. Markman regularly tackles this task, using a research-based method derived from data that he and his colleagues at the University of Denver have collected over decades of systematically observing unhappy and happy couples.

Happy Couples: Developing Healthy Habits
Markman offers three important ingredients of happy couples:

Avoid blowouts.
"The first is to learn to talk without fighting about inevitable conflicts," Markman says. Making a concerted effort to see the other person’s perspective, and avoiding the blame game of "she said" or "he did," goes a long way.

When things appear to be hedging toward a blowout, Markman urges couples to do what parents often tell young children: Take a "time out." It’s a tactic he calls “exiting out of destructive fighting.”

Recall the positive.
As parents often ask a child stewing in the time-out corner what she could have done differently, Markman suggests that couples in conflict take time to consider what brought them together in the first place. Then, he says, make room for those factors in your life again. “You’ve got to protect and preserve those positive connections -- the friendship, the fun,” Markman tells WebMD. These are aspects of marriage that happy couples keep intact.

Look to the future.
While turning the clock back can help couples rekindle lost connections, Markman urges couples to simultaneously look forward. “You’ve got to have a long-term vision of the future, shared dreams, and plans that represent a commitment to one another and your family,” he says.

Happy Couples: Addressing a Sexless Marriage
That future, according to most marriage experts, should include a healthy sex life. While sex isn’t everything to happy couples, sexual problems can lead to marital discord. That men and women tend to have different ideas about sex doesn’t help matters.

“Generally speaking, women tend to see sexuality as part of a larger construct. Men are exactly the opposite,” says James E. Sheridan, a judge and founder of Marriages That Work, a nonprofit organization in Michigan that teaches instructional courses on how to strengthen marriages. “Women have to be in the mood. Men have to be in the room.”

Many times, misunderstandings over these differences lead to a break down in a healthy sexual relationship within a marriage, even among happy couples. The result, say experts, is a sexless marriage. Patti Britton, president of the American Association for Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists, calls sexless marriages an “epidemic.” She reports that many of the married clients she sees haven’t had sex in 10 years.

Adopt a business approach to improve sex.
Seeing things from a business-like perspective helps couples reframe their sexual relationship. “I tell them, ‘If this were a business, would you let it flounder like this?’” Britton says.

Presenting sex in this light makes problems, and solutions, more concrete for couples. “By likening it [marriage] to a business mode -- with shared goals and missions; responsibilities, assets, and liabilities; and frequent business meetings -- things shift,” Britton tells WebMD.

Make honest assertions.
To salvage their sex lives, some couples need to dig deeper. “Often, sex wasn’t good in the first place. A big complaint for women is that foreplay is bad or nonexistent,” Britton says.

But this isn’t easy for anyone to admit. “I do a lot of pushing for the truth,” Britton tells WebMD. Some couples simply aren’t prepared to tell, or hear, the truth. “A lot of couples fall out of it. It pushes too many buttons,” she says.

Happy Couples: Learning Financial Savvy
The topic of family finances is another hot-button topic, even for happy couples.

Delegate the task of budget balancer.
Experts observe that most happy couples recognize that handling household finances should remain a singular task. “Only one person can work the checkbook. There can’t be two CFOs,” Sheridan tells WebMD.

That doesn’t mean, however, that the other partner should be kept in the dark about finances. Sheridan espouses making joint financial decisions, with just one person implementing.

Start an emergency fund.
He also strongly urges couples to plan for financial emergencies. This helps diffuse any potential blowups, such as who will sacrifice personal spending money when urgent house repairs must be funded.

Every couple faces adversity, from slumps in their sex lives to bickering over the checkbook balance. But Markman believes that most married people can learn to become happy couples. “If both partners are motivated, they can turn things around,” Markman tells WebMD.

www.webmd.com/elizabeth-heubeck

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Kids Harmed When Parents Fight

Unresolved Parent Conflicts Mar Kids' Emotional Development

Feb. 9, 2006 -- Unsettled fights between parents impair children's emotional development, new studies show.

Mom and Dad may shout till they're red in the face. They may stew in stony silence. Whether their unresolved conflict results in hostility or indifference to one another, it takes its toll on their children, find University of Notre Dame psychologist E. Mark Cummings, PhD, and colleagues.

Psychologists have long known that a strong child-parent bond is the key to kids' mental health and social adjustment. The new research suggests that it's just as important for children to feel secure about their parents' relationship with each other.

"What we show is that children's emotional security is affected by the relationship between the parents -- not just the child's relationship to the parent," Cummings tells WebMD.

Cummings' and colleagues report their findings in the January/February issue of Child Development.

Children Affected at All Ages
Cummings, study co-leader Patrick T. Davies, PhD, of the University of Rochester, N.Y., and colleagues actually did three new studies. They first looked at 226 children (9 to 18 years old) and their parents, evaluated three years apart. They then repeated the study with 232 kindergarten-aged kids.

The researchers evaluated the parents' marital functioning and quality, conflict tactics, and their ratings of their children's adjustment. They also evaluated the children for depression and asked them, privately, about how their parents got along.

Finally, they followed 223 6-year-olds and their parents over the course of a year. They looked at how parents worked out their disagreements and measured the children's distress reactions and negative thoughts. In each study the researchers accounted for kids' individual adjustment and other factors, allowing them to see what changes in the children were directly linked to parental conflict.

What they found was that parental conflict wasn't a problem if the parents resolved their differences. But when these conflicts remained open, children responded with depression, anxiety, and/or behavior problems.

"Parents don't realize that children are sensitive to their conflicts," Cummings says. "But we find they are sensitive at very early ages -- starting at 1 year of age, at least. Children are like emotional Geiger counters with regard to their parents' relationship. If parents really resolve things, children will know it. If they don't, children will know that, too."

Child and adolescent psychologist Nancy Cahir, PhD, says the findings support her observations.

"A lot of times, the misconception with families is that as long as they don't hit their kids, everything is fine," Cahir tells WebMD. "But sometimes the conflict between the parents can be just as damaging as physical abuse. If the child is constantly hearing arguments that don't get resolved, the child will have difficulties with attachment, with adjustment, and with basic trust of other people."

Interestingly, older kids were at least as affected as younger ones. Teens, Cummings says, were even more strongly affected than younger children.

And that's not all. Another study in the same issue of Child Development shows that children in high-conflict homes have much more restless sleep and daytime sleepiness. The more unresolved the parental conflicts, the more disrupted the child's sleep.

Bad Fights vs. Good Fights
"Everyone will have fights now and again that are pretty negative," Cummings says. "Children are not fragile this way. It is only when there is an accumulation of negative fights that the children lose confidence in the emotional security of the family."

The fights that hurt kids -- and parents -- may have some or all of these negative features:

Defensiveness
Personal insults
Verbal hostility
Nonverbal expressions of hostility
Stonewalling
Physical aggression. All experts tell WebMD that physical violence is enormously damaging to children's emotional well-being.
The fights that don't hurt kids -- and which may actually help them -- have many of these constructive features:

Problem solving
Compromise
Expressing positive feelings in the context of conflict
Making supportive statements
Verbal expressions of affection
What if parents can't help getting into a bad fight?

"One thing the parents could do is try to work toward a resolution, and let their child know about the resolution," Cummings says. "Even if the parents go behind closed doors and come out genuinely looking like they have resolved the conflict, the child will see it as resolved. And parents can explain to the child what happened."

The good news, Cahir says, is that even when children do suffer from parental conflict, much of the harm can be undone.

"Parents can get family or couples therapy to help them learn better ways to communicate," Cahir says. "And by doing so they are helping their children. Because the children learn from how the parents handle conflicts. If the parents can learn to control anger and not to blame the other, their behavior becomes a model the child can lean from."

This doesn't mean all fights are appropriate for children to witness, says Rebecca A. Jones, PhD, associate professor of clinical psychology at the Georgia School of Professional Psychology in Atlanta.

"I think it is really important that children be shielded from the really difficult fights that parents sometimes need to have," Jones tells WebMD. "They need to be shielded from conflicts that are too much for them to understand. If they do witness arguments, it is very important that they see their parents resolve those conflicts and compromise. Because that is how children learn that conflict is normal and healthy if resolved through communication."

What About Divorce?
Not all conflicts can be resolved. Sometimes parents find that they cannot continue with their relationship. Does this harm their children?

Jones, an expert in children of divorced parents, says kids do suffer when their parents' marriage breaks up. But it's even harder if parents stay together solely for the sake of the kids.

"There's been consistent evidence over the years that the process of divorce itself is hard on children," Jones says. "But even more important is the level of conflict between the parents. If children are experiencing a lot of fighting -- especially if the children are drawn into those fights -- that may be more harmful to their development than a divorce."

Cahir strongly agrees.

"If parents come to terms with the fact they are not happy with each other and cannot work it out, the children are better off if they divorce," Cahir says. "The bottom line is if the children see happy, content parents, they are better off. … I have had many clients say, 'I wish my parents had gotten divorced earlier,' because kids know when parents aren't happy. They learn that early on."

http://www.webmd.com/Daniel-J-DeNoon

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Choosing To Be Happy

Strategies for Happiness: 7 Steps to Becoming a Happier Person

A popular greeting card attributes this quote to Henry David Thoreau: “Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.”

With all due respect to the author of Walden, that just isn’t so, according to a growing number of psychologists. You can choose to be happy, they say. You can chase down that elusive butterfly and get it to sit on your shoulder. How? In part, by simply making the effort to monitor the workings of your mind.

Research has shown that your talent for happiness is, to a large degree, determined by your genes. Psychology professor David T. Lykken, author of Happiness: Its Nature and Nurture, says that “trying to be happier is like trying to be taller.” We each have a “happiness set point,” he argues, and move away from it only slightly.

And yet, psychologists who study happiness -- including Lykken -- believe we can pursue happiness. We can do this by thwarting negative emotions such as pessimism, resentment, and anger. And we can foster positive emotions, such as empathy, serenity, and especially gratitude.

Happiness Strategy # 1: Don't Worry, Choose Happy
The first step, however, is to make a conscious choice to boost your happiness. In his book, The Conquest of Happiness, published in 1930, the philosopher Bertrand Russell had this to say: “Happiness is not, except in very rare cases, something that drops into the mouth, like a ripe fruit. … Happiness must be, for most men and women, an achievement rather than a gift of the gods, and in this achievement, effort, both inward and outward, must play a great part.”

Today, psychologists who study happiness heartily agree. The intention to be happy is the first of The 9 Choices of Happy People listed by authors Rick Foster and Greg Hicks in their book of the same name.

“Intention is the active desire and commitment to be happy,” they write. “It’s the decision to consciously choose attitudes and behaviors that lead to happiness over unhappiness.”

Tom G. Stevens, PhD, titled his book with the bold assertion, You Can Choose to Be Happy. “Choose to make happiness a top goal,” Stevens tells WebMD. “Choose to take advantage of opportunities to learn how to be happy. For example, reprogram your beliefs and values. Learn good self-management skills, good interpersonal skills, and good career-related skills. Choose to be in environments and around people that increase your probability of happiness. The persons who become the happiest and grow the most are those who also make truth and their own personal growth primary values.”

In short, we may be born with a happiness “set point,” as Lykken calls it, but we are not stuck there. Happiness also depends on how we manage our emotions and our relationships with others.

Jon Haidt, author of The Happiness Hypothesis, teaches positive psychology. He actually assigns his students to make themselves happier during the semester.

“They have to say exactly what technique they will use,” says Haidt, a professor at the University of Virginia, in Charlottesville. “They may choose to be more forgiving or more grateful. They may learn to identify negative thoughts so they can challenge them. For example, when someone crosses you, in your mind you build a case against that person, but that’s very damaging to relationships. So they may learn to shut up their inner lawyer and stop building these cases against people.”

Once you’ve decided to be happier, you can choose strategies for achieving happiness. Psychologists who study happiness tend to agree on ones like these.

Happiness Strategy #2: Cultivate Gratitude
In his book, Authentic Happiness, University of Pennsylvania psychologist Martin Seligman encourages readers to perform a daily “gratitude exercise.” It involves listing a few things that make them grateful. This shifts people away from bitterness and despair, he says, and promotes happiness.

Happiness Strategy #3: Foster Forgiveness
Holding a grudge and nursing grievances can affect physical as well as mental health, according to a rapidly growing body of research. One way to curtail these kinds of feelings is to foster forgiveness. This reduces the power of bad events to create bitterness and resentment, say Michael McCullough and Robert Emmons, happiness researchers who edited The Psychology of Happiness.

In his book, Five Steps to Forgiveness, clinical psychologist Everett Worthington Jr. offers a 5-step process he calls REACH. First, recall the hurt. Then empathize and try to understand the act from the perpetrator’s point of view. Be altruistic by recalling a time in your life when you were forgiven. Commit to putting your forgiveness into words. You can do this either in a letter to the person you’re forgiving or in your journal. Finally, try to hold on to the forgiveness. Don’t dwell on your anger, hurt, and desire for vengeance.

The alternative to forgiveness is mulling over a transgression. This is a form of chronic stress, says Worthington.

“Rumination is the mental health bad boy,” Worthington tells WebMD. “It’s associated with almost everything bad in the mental health field -- obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, anxiety -- probably hives, too.”

Happiness Strategy #4: Counteract Negative Thoughts and Feelings
As Jon Haidt puts it, improve your mental hygiene. In The Happiness Hypothesis, Haidt compares the mind to a man riding an elephant. The elephant represents the powerful thoughts and feelings -- mostly unconscious -- that drive your behavior. The man, although much weaker, can exert control over the elephant, just as you can exert control over negative thoughts and feelings.

“The key is a commitment to doing the things necessary to retrain the elephant,” Haidt says. “And the evidence suggests there’s a lot you can do. It just takes work.”

For example, you can practice meditation, rhythmic breathing, yoga, or relaxation techniques to quell anxiety and promote serenity. You can learn to recognize and challenge thoughts you have about being inadequate and helpless.

“If you learn techniques for identifying negative thoughts, then it’s easier to challenge them,” Haidt said. “Sometimes just reading David Burns’ book, Feeling Good, can have a positive effect.”

Happiness Strategy #5: Remember, Money Can’t Buy Happiness
Research shows that once income climbs above the poverty level, more money brings very little extra happiness. Yet, “we keep assuming that because things aren’t bringing us happiness, they’re the wrong things, rather than recognizing that the pursuit itself is futile,” writes Daniel Gilbert in his book, Stumbling on Happiness. “Regardless of what we achieve in the pursuit of stuff, it’s never going to bring about an enduring state of happiness.”

Happiness Strategy #6: Foster Friendship
There are few better antidotes to unhappiness than close friendships with people who care about you, says David G. Myers, author of The Pursuit of Happiness. One Australian study found that people over 70 who had the strongest network of friends lived much longer.

“Sadly, our increasingly individualistic society suffers from impoverished social connections, which some psychologists believe is a cause of today’s epidemic levels of depression,” Myers writes. “The social ties that bind also provide support in difficult times.”

Happiness Strategy #7: Engage in Meaningful Activities
People are seldom happier, says psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, than when they’re in the “flow.” This is a state in which your mind becomes thoroughly absorbed in a meaningful task that challenges your abilities. Yet, he has found that the most common leisure time activity -- watching TV -- produces some of the lowest levels of happiness.

To get more out of life, we need to put more into it, says Csikszentmihalyi. “Active leisure that helps a person grow does not come easily,” he writes in Finding Flow. “Each of the flow-producing activities requires an initial investment of attention before it begins to be enjoyable.”

So it turns out that happiness can be a matter of choice -- not just luck. Some people are lucky enough to possess genes that foster happiness. However, certain thought patterns and interpersonal skills definitely help people become an “epicure of experience,” says David Lykken, whose name, in Norwegian, means “the happiness.”

By Tom Valeo
WebMD Feature
Reviewed by Cynthia Dennison Haines, MD

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Violence Is A Learned Behavior, Say Researchers At Wake Forest University

Science Daily — WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. - The strong association between exposure to violence and the use of violence by young adolescents illustrates that violence is a learned behavior, according to a new study, published by researchers at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center and included in the November issue of the Journal of Pediatrics.

"This study has tremendous implications," Robert H. DuRant, vice chair of pediatrics at Wake Forest University School of Medicine and an author of the study. "Even if children and adolescents are exposed to other risk factors that have traditionally been linked to youth violence and weapon carrying, adolescents are not likely to engage in violence if social learning from exposure to violence does not occur."
For many children and adolescents, both witnessing and being the victim of violence is a daily occurrence. In this study, researchers asked 722 Georgia middle school 11-and 12-year-olds, living in or around public housing, how many times they had been exposed to or had been a victim of violence in their communities. Violence was defined as participating in five different types including: participating in a physical fight which resulted in seeking medical attention, attacking someone with a weapon, using a weapon to force or get money or things from someone, carrying a concealed firearm, and carrying another weapon such as a razor or knife.
Only 1.4 percent of the students had not witnessed or been the victim of any violence and 54.1 percent of all students reported witnessing or being the victim of between one and 15 acts of violence, according to the study.
While the majority (58.5 percent) of these sixth grade students reported not engaging in any violent behaviors during the previous three months, 24.5 percent reported engaging in one or two violent acts and an additional 12 percent reported engaging in between three and six violent acts, according to the research.
"Five percent of these students reported engaging in seven or more violent acts during the previous three months and 30 percent of the students reported carrying a weapon other than a firearm one or more times recently," DuRant said. "This shows that our sixth graders have a high exposure to violence."
"Children learn violent behaviors in primary social groups, such as the family and peer groups, as well as observe it in their neighborhoods and in the community at large," DuRant added. "These behaviors are reinforced by what children and adolescents see on television, on the internet and in video games and movies, observe in music videos and hear in their music.
"When children are disciplined with severe corporal punishment or verbal abuse or when they are physically or sexually abused, it is not surprising that they behave aggressively or violently toward others."
In this study, DuRant found that several variables may increase the likelihood that a student would participate in a violent act. In addition to exposure to violence (which had the highest correlation with the use of violence scale), they include: multiple substance usage, interest in a gang, cigarette smoking, male gender and symptoms of depression.
"When combined, these six factors were strongly associated with whether these youths scored low, medium or high on the use of violence scale," DuRant said. "While you can't change your gender, you can start addressing these other risk factors at a young age and get them involved in pro-social groups," he said.
"For example, adolescents who attend religious services more often were less likely to use violence, regardless of their exposure to it. Previous studies show you can teach children skills to help them deal with conflict in non-violent ways and interact with others in an appropriate fashion. These findings point to the need to begin addressing the prevention of youth violence and aggressive behaviors before children enter middle school."
Over 700 predominately African-American students living in or around public housing and attending four middle schools in Augusta, Georgia were asked a series of question about their exposure to 15 forms of violence and their participation in 5 types of violent acts. Over 88 percent of the students were 11 or 12 years of age.
The Brenner Center for Child and Adolescent Health funded the study.

Note: This story has been adapted from a news release issued by Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center.

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