Is Hidden Anger Making You Gain Pounds?

Ralph loves fatty foods, doughnuts in particular. He finds himself consuming these by the droves in the mornings before he faces work. He tries repeatedly to stop this out-of-control overeating but he can't do it despite the fact that his rapidly increasing size is threatening his job at which he must appear personable.

Ralph loves fatty foods, doughnuts in particular. He finds himself consuming these by the droves in the mornings before he faces work. He tries repeatedly to stop this out-of-control overeating but he can't do it despite the fact that his rapidly increasing size is threatening his job at which he must appear personable. It is only when he discovers a hidden connection between anger and his overeating that Ralph gets a grip on this habit - I will tell you how in a moment, but let's look at that hidden connection first. What has anger got to do with overeating?

Surprising as it may seem, while anger won't raise the numbers on your scale directly, it can indirectly contribute to them in a big way because anger is one of the major causes of emotional overeating. If you find yourself reaching for your favorite comfort foods whenever someone makes you mad, your anger may be an indirect but important cause of your gaining pounds.

The reason for this is that food can be so soothing that it can allow you to avoid whatever negative emotions you may be feeling when the cravings strike. In fact, if you reach for the food fast enough, you probably don't even notice you're feeling anything unpleasant at all.

This is especially true for the emotion of anger. Society conditions us to keep our angry feelings under control but sometimes, this includes not feeling the anger at all. If you're like most people, you're not comfortable with anger. Food is an easy way to keep it at bay and avoid expressing it.

Of course, the problem is that your anger doesn't go anywhere when you eat unwisely as a way of handling it. You still feel the anger - it's just hidden from your awareness for a while by the temporary comfort of food. Meanwhile, the downside is that you become heavier, and the angry feelings remain dormant, ready to come up to the surface and bring about yet another food craving. It's a no-win continuous cycle.

Ralph is a perfect example. He feels completely unappreciated at work since his boss treats him like a scapegoat. Despite the fact that his sales figures surpass those of most of his coworkers, he watches others receive accolades while his work goes unnoticed. He continues to look for a more satisfying job, but he has yet to find one.

Ralph starts his day angry and ends it angry. The only way he can get past the anger and make it to work is by eating a few donuts for breakfast. When he gets home after another frustrating day, he goes straight for his favorite fatty comfort foods before he even makes dinner. Sometimes, he fills up so much on the fatty foods that he fails to eat anything nutritious at all.

It's certainly understandable why Ralph's situation would make him feel angry, but his coping mechanism is not helping. Instead, it undermines his health and causes him to put on pounds. This only adds to his frustration and his difficulty in finding another job.

While Ralph may not be able to immediately alter his situation at work, he can definitely change his own attitude. It isn't easy, but it's certainly preferable to allowing his anger to get the best of him. Ralph needs to acknowledge his anger and find a way to release it constructively. He could try martial arts or a punching bag until he finds a better job. If he keeps his focus on the positive steps he can take to change his circumstances, he will feel much better, and he won't have to drown his feelings with eating.

You can certainly see the logic. Using food to suppress anger is the equivalent of "swallowing" your feelings, rather than expressing them. And the biting action offers some relief because it satisfies the primal instinct to bite our enemies in defense. For this reason, crunchy foods may feel especially good at such times.

There are several techniques for conquering emotional overeating, but there is something you can do immediately to break the habit of using food as an anger suppressor:

Take a 3" x 5" index card and write the following sentence on it:

"Even though I'm angry at (insert name of person or situation) and can't express this openly, I deeply and completely accept myself (or "love myself," etc) without judgment."

Before you go to bed each night, and after you rise in the morning (and at any other time you wish), read this sentence out loud to yourself three times.

This is a mini-version of the powerful "EFT Choices Method" which is a highly effective technique for combating emotional overeating. EFT utilizes the principles of acupressure and uses light tapping on certain strategic comfort spots on your face and upper body to train your mind to become more peaceful and self-accepting - a great advantage for losing pounds. You will no longer feel that compulsion to grab for unnecessary food when you come into harmony with yourself and accept your anger.

Self-help techniques like EFT are especially important because they get to the core of the eating problem, while diets usually fail because they focus on what foods you are eating rather than the reason you're eating them.

If you want to stop emotional overeating, your first task is to become aware of the emotion you are suppressing. The next time you reach for that candy bar, stop and ask yourself if you are angry with someone. If so, try the EFT exercise provided above, and watch the pounds melt away!

By: Psychologist Dr. Patricia Carrington
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